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An Ode To Elnoriah’s Defense

December 29, 2009

Defense cap, oh defense cap, how I love you at 540,

When I become uncrittable- my healers owe it all to you.

However, when I am at 559 your gleam has all but shone, *

For here you are excessive, far too much for me to have known.

Yes I am still uncrittable, but this is far too over the top,

Fear not O’ Defense cap for it is not all your fault.

Damn you Blizzard for putting far too much Defense Rating on all Tanking gear,

Where is my hit, my Threat begins to wear?!

At 7k Threat Per Second, most DPS will not pull off of me, **

But I am only at 146 Hit, I demand much more.

Oh Defense Cap, your stats so true,

Turn into a bit of Hit and I will refrain from being blue.

Dearest Defense Rating, I wrote this letter to thou,

In hopes you would stop being a pain in the *OW*!

Blizzard, turn my 559 Defense into 540 with some Hit,

Or I swear your daughter will be bit! ***

Slightly less love,
Elnoriah- Last of the Mohegans Death Knight Tanks

* I’m not even joking, it is at 559 without gemming or enchanting for it. It’s frickin’ ridiculous, but it’s still not enough to take off Stoneskin Gargoyle.

** Arms warrior that insisted on pulling, or not letting me put down DnD/Disease/Pest. before charging in- I hope me letting you die 7 times allowed you to learn to give the Tanks a couple seconds to do their job. ❤ Elno- the “dude u sck tnk” (Thanks Healer for helping me teach him the lesson ❤ Elno)

Note: My TPS is subject to vary *nods*

*** If you think I’m kidding, try me, Aifel will do it Blizzard, trust me.

One Comment leave one →
  1. December 29, 2009 12:15 PM

    Nothing wrong with too much defense, it’s still the best source of avoidance ipoint for ipoint. Great poem, though!

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